As I sat by myself amongst the many rows of the mosque’s prayer halls, I was drowned by the takbir that echoed across the empty spaces. It was thereupeutic in a sense that I was feeling calm with all my thoughts being channelled out of my head for a moment or two.

I’ve always believed that things happen for a reason but with so many of them occuring thus far, I’m finding it hard to keep track of the reasons.

Babe how simple but true your words were - I’ve been bottling up my feelings.

Enjoy the holidays everyone and to my Muslim friends, Selamat Hari Raya.

I’m counting down, really. ’cause I’m excited for I’m anxious, scared for I’m uncertain but I gotta keep myself composed.

Just like many other people who enlisted before me, catching up with people close to heart has never been much more enjoyable. My dear cousins, member-member lepak, poly friends and close friends.

But all these HAD to be cramped within the 10 days time frame from the day Babe touched down in Singapore till the day I will be shipped off to Tekong. Grrr.

But it worth the time, money and travel. From Seah Im Food Centre to Haig Road to Le Caire to Miss Clarity Cafe to Max Brenner, to Kampong Glam Cafe… the different faces that I see all brought wide smiles to my face.

And Babe? The late night catch up session at Al-Ameen, the trip down to Discovery Centre that detoured the Army Museum short of the long list that I had penned down for ‘Places to go when you come back from Penang’ but I’m just glad that I got to see you back before you embark on another project.

Oh gawd I was really thinking how I survived growing my hair all long (and brown). When I saw my tresses (chey chey tresses or what) being detached from its roots and onto the white but unvirgin piece of cloth draped over my body, I was paying my last respects for the all living things that have been seeking solace on my scalp since god knows when.

Wow that’s a long and probably a grammatically correct sentence.

So yes, don’t bother typing my URL for the next 2 weeks ’cause I’m not putting any posts on timestamp. Go enjoy your post POP days, make your bf/gf happier or work extra hours for your boss.

BMT-oh!

Lights out!

1 message received.

“How are you doing dear?”

“I am fine. I can’t wait to see you this weekend dear.”

Message sent.

Off to bed.

Inilah kisahnya, seorang paderi mengundur diri.
Mengundur dari segala saki-baki.
Segala yang telah dia mencari-cari selama ini.

Bak kata pepatah,
Harapkan pagar, pagar minum todi.
Bila dah mabuk, semuanya kelihatan blurry.
Lari berkeliaran, lupa diri.

Bila susah Tuhan menolong,
Tapi bila dah bongkak, tiada sesiapa akan menyokong.
Walaupun kau terpekik terlolong.

Bilik gelap boleh on lampu,
Hati gelap tiada sesiapa pun yang boleh membantu.
Bukan ibu bapa kau, saudara-mara kau ataupun adikmu yang satu.

Hanya tatapan muka di depan cermin,
Bergabungkan minda yang luas serta fikiran yang waras,
Yang dapat menyelesaikan isi hati yang keliru.

Biarlah kau dengar kata-kata orang,
Tetapi jangan mensia-siakan otakmu itu.
Biarlah kau dibakar arang,
Kerna itulah jalan yang seharusnya dituju.

Alangkah aneh sungguh kehidupan ini,
Berliku-liku, berduri-duri,
Tersangkut sekali masih nak lagi,
Ibaratkan dah beranak isteri masih nak berjolly!

Sialah… the meet-up with my dear cousin today actually opened up my mind a little bit. Yeah, her presence usually doesn’t trigger that action but today it did. It has dawned on me that my future is kinda shaky, if not uncertain.

A recent consultation with my aunt regarding the whole epic drama about my dad has dug out the fact that I actually don’t have much money to further my studies. Thus I’ve decided that after my NS stint, I’m giving myself 2 years to work, earn some money and save up for a degree.

So here’s my masterplan…

After NS/ start of work - 22
End of work/ start of degree - 24
End of degree/ start of work - 28
Still working/ get married - 30

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